Sigh...

Although the building has been quiet for days, I woke up this morning to Corbies' companion Koraki screeching at the top of its lungs. I guess her daughter is here again... Koraki always seems to be louder whenever her daughter is here. Sigh. I don't even know why she bothers to come visit anymore because she always causes a riot! 

      Despite my shocking awakening, I think today will end up being a good day... Maybe I will take my bag with me and go down the park or the old vacant lot down the street. The sun is shining so brightly today and the wind is blowing ever so slightly. It makes me just WANT to be outside.... Maybe I can find my wallet today and actually get that stupid freaking Advil. I walk down the eight flights of stairs rolling my eyes at Ms. Pigg as she plays her sousaphone and waves to everyone she sees. The sunshine fills my soul with joy for the first time in a long time and I love it. With my bag slung over my shoulder I turn and head towards the drugstore. Once I mosey my way in, I find my advil and pull out my not-so-invisible wallet (for once) and dig out the $2.65 I owe.

My Advil bought, I walk back into the warmth of the bright sunshine and feel the rays seep into my skin. I stretch and realize I haven't eaten today. I turn down to the Jamaican restaurant and open the door to the smells of roasted meats and rice. When I sit down the waitress came and brought me a glass of water while I decided between the chicken and the stewed fish. I decided on the fish. When she brought it to me the aromas filled my nose and lifted my soul. The first bite gave me a rush so heavenly I thought I had died.... I finished my meal, paid my bill and walked back into the sun. Feeling full and happy, my mind wandered to my dreams and I subconsciously reached around to make sure my bag was still over my shoulder. I sighed in relief and wandered on down the road...

I Am Me....

I found myself standing outside my door this evening. Nobody was out. The wind was whistling through under my door from the crack near the window.... I thought I had caulked that.... hmmm oh well. Anyways, I want to go down and see if anybody is home downstairs. It has just been one of those days which I needed to relax, have a drink, and just talk to somebody. Somehow that never has seemed to work out. People don't seem to see me at times. I figure I might as well head down to the drug store... I need some more advil. Yet the halls are still silent, nobodys around, I feel alone as I walk down step by step, stair by stair. My mind keeps wandering to him... I need him here, my soul is empty without his love but nevertheless I continue on day by day. It seems that just walking to the drug store for something that appears so simple is a daily struggle. I never thought I would find love so early in life. I'm only 22 for Christs sake! But I have learned that one may never stop love. My mind races through all this on my way to the drug store. I get down to the drug store. I manage to find the advil and as I walk to the counter I realize that money is invisible in my pocket.... Advil gets placed back on the counter and I force myself to begin the lonesome walk back to room 804