Saturday, December 11, 2010

Life Can Never Be Boring...

As I wake up from a long restful night of sleep, the covers have slipped off and my skin is chilled in a way I have not felt in a long time. I look out my leaking window to the sight of snow. The sight is one I have always loved and treasured since I was a child. It was one of the only times I ever got time with my mother... she was always working or in her room doing things I never want to think about. As my mind wanders to my past I wander over to the window and look around. Despite the beauty of the falling snow, the ground is covered with slush. A brown disgusting slush of snow, ice, and dirt. My stomach turns at the sight but I still crave to be out there where the world will be quiet for once.

I turn to face the pile of clothes around my room while trying to find the warmest items I have. I manage to find an old pair of thick brown socks and a blue insulated jacket that my ex gave me for our anniversary. Once I slip on my socks and shoes and pull on my jacket I walk back to the window. My gut turns but I know if I don't go out and enjoy the coldness I will only regret it. I turn my back to the window and face the door which has previously only led to my misery.

Once I find my way down the rickety stairs, the coldness overwhelms me and brings a smile to my face. I decide that the best place for me to go is someplace to get food. I have not eaten in days and it has begun to take a toll on my body. I quickly cross the road and turn down Maple Street. The slush is soaking through my shoes and socks but I ignore it. The chill, in some weird way warms me... By the times I had snapped back to reality, I was outside the bar. As I walked inside, I realized how hungry and cold I was. The bar called my name and I ordered myself a cheeseburger and fries with a large coke. The food filled my belly while the grease ran down my fingers. But I did not care...

As I walked back outside, I could see the lonely man walking to the park. Whenever I look out my window at this time I always see him. The weight of the pain he carries is visible on his shoulders... I can't help but wonder what is wrong. What happened in his life that causes him to have this much pain and heartbreak??? I wish I could help the poor soul and be the cause of him raising his head even a little. But I can only watch as he walks away....